Big Mango Bar
drink and blog

Anal probe anyone?

Posted by sideshowBOB | Blog, Reader Submissions | Posted on May 31st, 2009

On this same day last week I was in Monaco – watching the Formula 1. Had a nice holiday that started with a trip to Norwich via Amsterdam. This was my first trip in a long while so obviously dealing with the real world was some what of a shock to me.  I will write later about my comparisons of life here versus the real world. I guess the net net of it is – one can make more money in the real world because if you didn’t then you would not be able to afford anything. Damn – shit is expensive.

Upon landing in Norwich I was greeted by the friendly Passport Control guy who commented on my passport. I have the world’s thickest passport since it is almost up for renewal and I traveled a lot before. It gets a lot of looks. However this guy thought it was cool and wanted to know if I had a Norwich stamp – seeing I did not he was more than happy to add it.

I sensed I was home free but then I realized I had not been through customs yet but I was feeling that a nice American like myself would sail through a small little village town like Norwich. Right – Daywalker forgot to tell me that Norwich is the training ground for UK customs twats. I guess I had a bulls eye painted on my back sometime during the flight.

First they asked where I had come from. I said Bangkok. I am sure they immediately assume that I am some lowlife who dates women half my age, drinks too much but possesses an eternally sunny disposition. Of course they are correct. Either way just the mere utterance of the word BANG KOK – brought all the troops around.

Says here you came from Amsterdam. Yes – I connected via Amsterdam but came in from Bangkok. You mind if we check your bags? Go right ahead sir. Did you pack your own bags and is this your luggage?

That is where I started to sweat a bit. You see I actually borrowed Daywalker’s luggage and part of my stuff was my motorcycle gear that was sent by my mom and of course I just threw it into the borrowed luggage without even looking at it. So there I was having the lining of my underwear checked and I was not even using my own luggage that was full of stuff I did not pack. Nice.

Anyway. They grilled me, searched me, and checked every nook and cranny hoping to find something. Of course they did not and their look of disappointment was not lost on me. I rather enjoyed it knowing that these guys are so lame at screening people since they always key off such obvious things while I am sure the real stuff slips by them all the time.

I am home now. A mixed feeling really since I am happy to be back but always tough to get back to the grind after a real holiday. Many thanks to those who kept the blog running while I was out since one thing I will say about being in England and France – there is a serious lack of free Wi-Fi spots so getting online was a real pain in the ass. I will say that it seems easier to get connected for free here in Bangkok than it was on holiday.

Back to the grind…

Got sent this article about the Real Estate market. Interesting how people are selling their homes at a loss but since the baht is stronger than it was in the past – people are still even on their investment. I am still stunned how strong that baht has stayed in the face of what will now be a massive recession:

Currency fluctuations are also affecting the Thai second-home market, according to Mr. Gray. He said the baht’s relative strength against foreign currencies, including the ruble, the British pound and the Australian dollar, was motivating cash-strapped foreign second-home-owners to sell their Thai holdings. ‒A lot of people are cashing in on the exchange rate right now,” he said. ‒People can take much less for their homes and still not lose anything.”

Catch this one about the Cambodian fortune teller in Pattaya? I couldn’t stop laughing – at both the photos and how stupid these girls are. So they meet a fortune teller on the street who promises better luck for the girls if they do the ritual in their apartment. Then they are told to drink something. They wake up and all their shit is gone. Go figure. Jesus – how stupid can they get but I just want to know if the photos are a re-enactment or the real deal.

In all the political talk about Thaksin and the former regime, my take has always been that he was bad for expats, bad for entrepreneurs and bad for the night life. Bangkok Eyes has a nice article discussing some of this:

MH:    So, then, with at least the promise of a return to a rule-of-law society, doesn’t this equate to a better long-term outlook for tourism and for the Thai Nightlife Scene?

S:    Yes, but we shouldn’t take it for granted at this point.  These Red Shirt-Yellow Shirt riots have divided the Thai nation politically in unprecedented fashion.  Before, politics used to be a bunch of good-old-boys at the top, all corrupt, all waiting for the next election, waiting for their turn to dip from the well.  The guy with the most ‘canvassers’, and the most ‘red ones’ to hand out had it in the bag.  Now with the dawning of the age of colored-shirt adversaries, many enemies have been made, people are actually getting arrested and prosecuted.  The bad blood hasn’t disappeared, and it is likely to be around for the long haul.

As you know, political fortunes can reverse, and the strangest of arrangements can actually come to pass.  For example, who would have thought five years ago that Samak could become Prime Minister?  No one took him for anything but a loud, vulgar, minor politician getting all he could, while he could.  If we want to examine the possibilities downstream for Thailand’s tourism and Nightlife, the very worst that could happen would be if Thaksin were to succeed in his attempts to return and once again become Prime Minister.  Remember, despite his recent protestations of wanting “rule-of-law” and wanting “Democracy” for Thailand, his record is something entirely different.  When in office he went on record as saying specifically that Democracy was not his objective.  As for rule-of-law, 2,500 people were extrajudicially executed in the streets and by-ways of this nation – on his watch, and under his oversight – this should never be forgotten or diminished in any way.

You will recall that the blackest days, or should I say, ‘nights’ in Thailand’s Nightscene history were also on his watch, when he had Khun Purachai crack down on the Night Entertainment Industry across the board, creating politically expedient Entertainment Zones, and threatening to close down entire Night Entertainment Areas.  If you at Bangkok Eyes want something to keep you awake at night, that’s it.  That’s the one.

Well – that is it for now. Stay tuned for some party announcements and the ramp up to the anniversary party.

Word is Lollipop in Nana has a Luk-Krung…